Knitting My Heart to Another's

My lovely friend J. Elle's new book Wings of Ebony comes out this week (tomorrow!). In honor of her and upcoming Black History month (and MLK Day, which I missed already), I wanted to spend some time reading books that would give me a window into African American life. This last year we have had a lot of challenging conversations about race with our kids, wanting to do what we can on our end to prepare our kids to be advocates, defenders, supporters, and friends. The Man and I have read articles and books, talked to our minority friends, and spent a lot of time in prayer and discussion together. I haven't talked about this on the blog much because there are so many other voices who are talking about these issues with much more eloquence and insight, but I did want to share a few of the books that I've read just this week in particular.

May I challenge you, if you pick up one of these books yourself, not to read looking for what you agree or disagree with, but just to listen to the voices of those who have traditionally not been heard? Let them speak, let yourself be uncomfortable...and sit with it for a little while. 

Well-Read Black Women by Glory Edim. This collection of essays gave me so much food for thought. Well written and easy to pick up whenever I got a break (not as easy to put down), I came to this book expecting to walk for a while in another's shoes (and did!) but didn't expect to see a reflection of myself in the pages as well--myself caught between cultures, uncomfortable in my own skin, simultaneously feeling both not enough and too much. Chances are that you too have at some point felt "other", and if you have not, that you have people around you who do. Worth the read.

Dear Martin by Nic Stone. I picked this book up one morning and didn't get up again until it was finished an hour and a half later. Powerful and thought provoking, it was filled with nuance and grace. I cared deeply about the protagonist, Justyce, and his friends, and my heart broke again over the bigger issues through which they were struggling. Front end warning that this is written from the perspective of a 17 year old boy so there is language used that some may feel to be crass. My reminder to myself was that it's always the moments when I feel that I'm not being heard that I want to use the strongest words.

This Is My America by Kim Johnson. I stayed up far too late last night to finish the last few pages of this book. Both a mystery and a powerful confrontation of how historic racism has to be pulled up by the roots instead of just brushed over and moved past, I didn't always like this book. I am still glad that I read it. If I only ever read books that make me feel happy, I am never going to receive a chance to grow. Sometimes, I need to jam my ski-shaped size eleven feet into someone else's shoes for a while before I can walk away humbled, with more compassion and a wider perspective.

I'll close with this. One of the lines in Dear Martin wonders about whether, when white juries acquit a white shooter, it is because they look at the white defendant and see themselves, and don't want to see a murderer in their mirror. It reminded me of a conversation I'd had with my Bible study kids where they connected Matthew 5:21-22 to Matthew 10:17, 21 with the powerful acknowledgement, "We are all murderers and traitors." Yes, that is the truth. When we look in our hearts, there hides a murderous traitor. And this is good news. In our own racism, we see our need for Jesus. He has come that we may have life and so that our brothers and sisters with different skin tones and cultures and stories may have life too. But if we don't first look in the mirror and see our own inner ugliness, we'll never understand our need for Jesus. And then we'll be missing out on so much, most of all on a relationship with him, but also on a depth of love and a closeness of knit hearts with those around us.