The Laws of Move Month
It is the law of move month that if something can go wrong, it probably will. And it’s good to know this on the front end, because then you can meet the unexpected with a sense of humor.
For the most part.
Some things just aren’t funny (like accidentally busting out the back window of the truck).
But other things are.
Like the inevitable move growth spurt. Why does this always happen? In the past, it wasn’t that big of a deal. You show up with toddlers wearing pants an inch too short and every other military mom knows exactly what happened. But this year, it was Bee who hit the growth spurt. And instead of showing up like a tiny homeless child in ill fitting clothes, she made her debut in CA wearing bootie shorts and crop tops. Which, you know, knock yourself out if that’s your jam, but I’m not sure I’m quite ready to commit my seven year old to a life of wedgies and skin cancer.
Then there is the constant threat of car sickness. Who is going to blow? And when will it happen? Trust me: never when it’s convenient.
Wednesday, I woke up in the middle of the night to the lovely sound of Trigger losing his dinner all over the RV bedroom carpet. After being on a hunger strike for our two days in TN (that turned into three days, thanks to unexpected weather), he finally ate his dog food…and then promptly regurgitated it. Even in my panicked, sleep-drugged state, I knew I had to keep him from barfing on his bed. The carpet was cleanable, but the dog bed would be a pain in the rear to scrub out and it had to go in the car with us the next morning. Victory was mine—and it was a sweet win. There was fist pumping, and the Man was very confused and worried for his wife’s sanity.
I continued to rest on my laurels until Twinkle got car sick the following day and threw up all over that very dog bed. Do you know what’s harder to get out of a dog bed than dog barf? Yep, a child’s “I just ate chocolate” barf. Once we stopped for the night and I got Twinkle cleaned up and the car and dog bed back to functional, I took my own shower, reveling in cleanliness…only to find a giant cat hairball waiting for me in front of the closet.
Other than barf and growth spurts, there was a check engine light that turned on (and then off) and a seat belt latch that busted. There was a clogged gray tank and movers who didn’t show up when we expected them. There was stuff loaded onto the truck that didn’t belong to us (and then unloaded, thankfully). There were nights when I couldn’t fall asleep and mornings when I woke up too early. There were days when we cried and days when we laughed…and days when we laughed so hard that we cried (or maybe that was just me). There were tantrums and meltdowns and not all of them were mine.
And there was so much to enjoy.
Audiobooks and the view of the Grand Canyon and rain on the roof of the RV. Twinkle managing to pet a squirrel when our backs were turned and late evening walks with the dog around diverse campgrounds across the US. Empty garage basketball games once the moving truck left and burping contests after I let the kids finish a bottle of soda someone had given us. Squeezing in last minute memories and Oswald making friends with the gate guard when we pulled onto our new base. Bringing our own tree to the desert and our own party to the middle of nowhere.
And here’s the thing: I can remember what went wrong and walk into the next move with pessimism and a bad attitude, or I can remember what went right, which might end with blind optimism and rose colored glasses, or I can try to remember both and hopefully approach the next round with a measure of perspective and grace for both myself and my family.
I’m hoping for the latter.
So it’s important for me to remember both sides of the coin. Yes, I have cat scratches all over both wrists from getting Blythe in and out of the cat carrier all week, and also, yes, there’s a butterfly tree in the backyard of our new house—but if you insist on using your butt warmer while driving through the desert (Littles), it will melt your chocolate covered pretzels.
By which I mean: just because it’s the law of move month that if something can go wrong, it will, doesn’t mean that a whole lot of other things won’t also go very, very right.
