October Is For Openness
Hello, favorite,
Yes, I’m talking to you.
You may have noticed that I’ve been a little quiet on the blog front, and probably chalked it up to settling in and starting school and weathering Covid and being held hostage by my children—and you would’ve been right. But it’s also been quiet because my old frenemy Depression decided to show up to play again.
I’ve been pretty open on this blog about my ongoing struggles with depression, and there are a couple reasons for that. First, because it’s nothing to be ashamed of. And second, because, as with most shadows, the more we expose it to the light, the more it shrivels up and slinks away. With that said, I don’t write a lot about my depression while I’m in the trenches, because doing so is frankly just hard. And because I know I don’t owe that to anyone. Walking through seasons of struggle, especially mental health struggles, requires a lot of work and grace and prioritizing. And it is enough to keep taking the next right step, and sometimes that means stepping away from the blog for a bit.
However—and this is a big however—writing is a great way for me to keep a pulse on how I’m actually doing. When I stop writing: it’s a generally sign that things aren’t going so well because writing requires honesty and vulnerability, two things that are challenging when your brain is trying to kill you. But writing tends to also be something of a cure. So, having given grace and made some necessary challenging choices over the last month, I know that the next thing, the next right thing, is to get back to writing—and writing on a regular basis.
So for the month of October, I’m going to be going back to some old school blogging roots and do my own 31 Days series. I’m not bothering to check in with other bloggers doing 31 Days. I’m sure they’re out there. I’m sure I could fritter away many hours reading everyone else’s posts in an attempt to ignore the train wreck going on inside my mind. But my hope is to just do something small and life giving for this next month, and only partially as a distraction from the Halloween decorations Bee made me put out today. {Side note: our skeleton now has a hook hand.}
Anyway, I’m sure you’re wondering: are we just reading random blog posts all month or does she actually have a topic? And (actually) I do. In the spirit of openness (and encouragement), over the next 30 days, I’ll be writing open letters of encouragement every day. Most of them will be short. It remains to be seen whether any of them will be funny or poignant or thought provoking. Some of them might feature some of you. Don’t worry, names will be withheld to protect the innocent.
And listen, don’t feel like you need to stop by here every day this month. Come if you want. I’d love it if you do. But the most important part for me is that I continue doing something I love, exercising a gift that God’s given, because I am still alive, and it is a life worth living.
Also, because, as I’m fond of saying to my kids: encouragement energizes—whether we’re giving or receiving it. And I could use a little more energy these days.
And maybe you could too.
